I think it's homesickness. I miss Chino. I can only say that in the safety of this blog because my husband never reads this, and he NEVER wanted to leave Chino. When we realized we had to move, I quickly realized we couldn't afford to stay in Chino. For what we wanted, and the home we were looking for, I knew we had to look elsewhere. Leonard tried desperately to find us a way to stay and I was so wishy-washy. I knew we couldn't stay and I was in "movin' on" mode.
Eastvale was a great new city, with beautiful homes, good school districts and my sister was nearby which was a plus. It lacked a lot of things Chino had, like the old mixed in with the new. Chino had lots of little hole in the wall places that had been around for years, where there were plenty of regulars and was bursting with character. It also had lots of new development and shopping and all the conveniences we needed. The good news is that Eastvale is still growing and holds a lot of promise of things to come.
One thing I just accepted when I realized we were leaving Chino was that we were leaving and that was that. I never thought about how hard it was going to be to leave the people we had surrounded ourselves with there. I miss my ward something awful. I had made so many great friends, and my kid had made friends too. Luckily, Chino is only 8 miles away which is nothing, and I still go every week to visit with girls at the park while our kids play. It is a great 2 hours that I truly look forward to. However, on Sunday's when I go to my new ward, and I look around and don't recognize any of the faces (with a few exceptions) I realize how much I miss Chino. Even though I attended church alone (without the hubby) I never felt alone. Sure I would love to have a husband who attended church with me but it never was a big deal because I would go to church and never be alone. I rarely sat alone, and everyone always extended such huge welcomes to me and LL.
I miss that the most. I know, logically, that with time, I will build those same types of relationships and it won't always feel like this but for now, I'm homesick.
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6 comments:
You sound like me when I first moved into our new condo, away from my parents. I missed our full house (having 4 siblings and a few neighbors who also "lived" there.) That house was never empty. What a shock it was when it was just Gerardo and I, not even Zero the dog or our son.
You said it right, time will fix your feelings. I am sorry you are going through it though, because I know how empty it feels.
I think what is also contributing to your feelings may be the weather. It's so unpredictable and gloomy.
Are you going to Disneyland any time soon? We should take the kids :)
You're allowed. Moving is always hard. And I think we always miss the old place and think the new place sucks. Hopefully you'll start to feel more at home soon.
You echoed my exact thoughts when I sat in our ward in Clovis those first few months. Actually it took us 5 years before we embraced our ward with an open heart, but we were like that in Fontana. The only thing that kept us going was our FAITH in CHRIST.
Anyways, I remember sitting there looking around & said to my son Davie, "Man...I hate not being able to look around & see someone's face & just KNOW what's going on with them." I pay a lot of atttention to peoples faces & body language & spend time getting to them so I can be in some sort of "place" to be sensitive enought in my day to day activities to percieve a need or two.
I swear, the feeling was a blank, empty wall or canvas in that meeting despite the jammed packed room. Funny isn't it? ZION truly IS wherever you are at! Sorry you have to feel like that but then again, you are going to pass through alot of stuff since you & Big L are not idle people. So...GOOD LUCK! LOL I love you & you know it! HUGS Lizzie!
You echoed my exact thoughts when I sat in our ward in Clovis those first few months. Actually it took us 5 years before we embraced our ward with an open heart, but we were like that in Fontana. The only thing that kept us going was our FAITH in CHRIST.
Anyways, I remember sitting there looking around & said to my son Davie, "Man...I hate not being able to look around & see someone's face & just KNOW what's going on with them." I pay a lot of atttention to peoples faces & body language & spend time getting to them so I can be in some sort of "place" to be sensitive enought in my day to day activities to percieve a need or two.
I swear, the feeling was a blank, empty wall or canvas in that meeting despite the jammed packed room. Funny isn't it? ZION truly IS wherever you are at! Sorry you have to feel like that but then again, you are going to pass through alot of stuff since you & Big L are not idle people. So...GOOD LUCK! LOL I love you & you know it! HUGS Lizzie!
I'm sorry you're suffering from homesickness. Moving is always harder than you think it'll be. I've lived in five cities since 2006, and every move pinched in some way. All I can say is that it gets better with time. Good luck!
We miss you too. It was so fun to see you the other night and see little Lucas. You are always welcome to come visit anytime- we love you and think of you often.
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